Would I do this all again
One of my sisters and I have a polite disagreement pending, which I suspect will never be resolved.
Whereas I spent acres of my youth sitting still and reading books – in the process learning about life and other people, and how to write, but feeling as if I neither experienced nor did very much at first hand – my sister spent her youth gadding about, and she is still gadding. She is very much a doing at first hand kind of girl.
Now, with the onset of late middle age, I begin to start moving around, timidly and uncertainly, but finally – YES! – I am finally moving around, and doing things, (because if I don’t start soon, it will be too late). Whereas my sister, who is getting tired from all her gadding about, tells me she relishes sitting and reading a book very much.
My point being, I have a suspicion that for me, reading, as much as anything, can become an addictive reaction; whereas my sister, who is so active, sees nothing sinister at all in sitting still and enjoying the refreshment of a good book.
Which brings me to what I wanted to say at the start.
In the last ten years, since I stopped reading quite so much and started writing, I suspect that Life has taken this glimmer of an opportunity, to throw at me all the lessons that I should have picked up earlier, and which I would have picked up, if I had hidden less in reading and had more of an active life. (I know reading can be an addictive pastime, because I can still feel myself, occasionally, yearning to dive into a good book when I want to run and hide from life.)
I suspect I have learned more about Life in the last ten years, than I did in the previous forty years. I daresay all the lessons, inspiration and hard work that I have got through to get to this point would have come to me, sooner or later, in different forms.
So, yes, I would do this all again, but I’m very glad I don’t have to. I’m very pleased and relieved to have got to where I am today, alive, in one piece and with my love, optimism and determination still intact.
Thank you so much for reading.