July 9, 2020

Tools of time management

Fran's School of Hard Knocks, Happiness Matters, The Rights & Wrongs of Writing 0 Comments

Tools of time management.

Since I work for myself, I have to be both my own organiser and the one who gets things done. I have to be the one who says what goes, and who does what she’s told. And lately – in fact, for far too long – I’ve been prevaricating and feeling a bit lost, because I have not understood that both roles have different purposes, and both roles are essential.

So, instead of actively using tools of time management and organising my time – accepting the role of organiser – I’ve been hiding in books and in details. It’s very easy, in a lockdown situation to hide from the realisation that I’ve been stalling. I’ve needed someone to tell me what to do. But – Ha! – that is my job. So….?

So I have to be the one who sets up my own timetable. This very quickly gives my weeks a structure that enables me to allocate different times to certain allotted tasks. Having committed the time in advance, I do not then find myself thinking endlessly about all those other tasks which still have to be done and which are less than thrilling: shopping, laundry, meal prep…

With the help of a timetable, routine jobs are given their allocated time, before which I am allowed to accumulate a small pile of things that will be dealt with then. So I can stop thinking about them. That way, I free up loads of space and crucial mental energy for many of the things I prefer to do, deploying timetabling so that I can say, “Sorry, I’m busy at the moment…” and mean it.

Having even the rudiments of a timetable is as important to tell us what we can leave doing until later, as for reminding us what we can do now.

Thanks for reading.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

June 25, 2020

What to expect from Covid

Happiness Matters 2 Comments

What to expect from Covid.

I read worrying news that Covid is on the rise again in China, the country whose experiences in the latest infection control seem to be the lodestar for the rest of the world. New outbreaks, more infectious, with a super-spreader at the centre, requiring the tracing and testing of literally hundreds, then thousands, of people. Elsewhere, there are sporadic outbreaks in countries that have previously managed to keep their outbreaks under control. More infectious may not mean more deadly, but it’s all to be seen.

And what can we do? I’m not sure what to expect from Covid. It seems that, if we pursue the Scottish objective to its logical conclusion, the hope is that Covid will be eradicated here. There are some smaller countries that have managed eradication, presumably at the cost of not allowing travel beyond a radius of say, ten miles, controlling cross-border movement and so on: difficult to maintain, though presumably cross-border controls will continue to be necessary for a fixed or limited period – a year, six months? – and then gradually, we may hope to see them lifted, as part of a package of measures including widespread testing, quarantine arrangements for those who have to travel and eventually, an effective vaccine.

Meantime, here we all sit each of us alone and together as our family circumstances dictate, waiting to hear, and increasingly dependent on our on-line tools for social and business interaction. I worry most about our children, who cannot be expected to learn everything from their carers, no matter how well balanced or optimistic the adults around them might be, and who rely on people from outside their family circle to evolve and develop socially.

I am puzzled by the ramifications of losing physical sharing, laughter and picnics in the park, and I have to hope that life can resume, eventually, allowing us to emerge into daylight, in groups, and sharing hugs, whispered secrets and good times.

Thanks for listening.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

June 16, 2020

Holidays in lockdown

Happiness Matters, Making Miracles 4 Comments

Holidays in lockdown

How do we take holidays in lockdown? It might seem peculiar, in a time of enforced mass inactivity, to talk of Summer holidays. We don’t want time off work! We need to get back to work…! And yet, old habits die hard: despite the changes, we are advised to keep things as “normal” as possible, our usual yearly activities almost always include a long summer vacation and in less that two weeks, both my husband and my daughter will be “on holiday”.

If we are forced to shelter in place or isolate, how can we enjoy a holiday feeling? I have a few suggestions which you can maybe relate to, and which I hope will soften the blow of a staycation, even if you are yearning to get away.

~ Since holidays are all about being looked after by others, take steps to share the burdens of daily living: routine tasks such as cooking, cleaning and laundry are much more fun when shared. Make a party of it and put on music, dance.

~ Buy a new set of linen and put it on the bed. Freshly laundered sheets always make me feel happier.

~ With our weekly shop, we can experiment with new foods, dishes and meals that take the sweat out of cooking. Eat a main meal at lunchtime instead of in the evening and try out new salads, drinks and prepared foods. Short-cuts can be such a boost.

~ I’ve cleared out my wardrobe again and I’m wearing a lot of the clothes I keep “for special occasions”. If you’re anything like me, the time is fast approaching when that special occasion is right now, this minute. If you need matching gear, order it on-line, and if that is beyond your budget, browse for ideas and accessorise with what you have at home.

~ Clear out cupboards and put together a present box: wrapping papers, celebration bags, ribbons and bows. Recycle the old, well used seasonal stuff that you don’t really like, so that you know, next time you want to wrap a present, it’s all organised tidy for you. Then exchange presents for the season. Small is beautiful.

~ spend more time outdoors in all weathers. There’s no restriction on walking and travelling near home, so let’s spend more time out in the fresh air. It’s such a wonderful time of year.

I’ve been up since the crack of dawn and have already recorded and sent a contribution to The Word Bin, a new audio podcast, “The Word Bin” from Fair Acre Press. Check out the link and have a go, it’s great fun!

Thanks for listening.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

June 8, 2020

Reading Marian Keyes books

Books I Have Reviewed, The Rights & Wrongs of Writing, Women's fiction and chic lit 2 Comments

Reading Marian Keyes books again, I am struck by how the messages I collect from her writing, change and evolve to fit my feelings and thoughts of the moment.

Uplifting messages of personal courage are there, of course; and so are the quieter messages of human existence: even though our heroines might go flying off at short notice to America in pursuit of a dream (“The Woman who stole my life” / “Angels”) their heroism is also about accepting and learning how to live with and truly love the ordinary things in life.

Unlike some authors of fiction (whom I shall not mention) not only are Marian Keyes’ heroines ordinary gals and blokes – no Dukes, formula One racing champions, top models or artistic virtuosi – their stories are not about how they won the lottery, effortlessly qualified for the Olympics, secured a mega corps film deal or were “discovered” on the beach by a top modelling agency… Instead, after their adventures, Keyes’ heroines often arrive back home with a fresh recognition that the ordinary things in life – true love, a meaningful job – are not so ordinary after all, and can be the stuff of which dreams and contentment are made, if only we have the sense to see it.

The kind of trite, “rags to riches” success stories that feature in so much popular fiction – the idea that a bright idea and a sparky attitude are enough to propel even the humblest aspirant to undreamt of recognition and success – are what first gave me the idea to write fiction differently, because I think that readers might sometimes like a choice: to read fanciful fairy tales that transport them to other worlds, or to locate within the pages of a novel, heroes and heroines who have experiences they can relate to their own lives.

I’ve always said that I can only write from my own experience, and that is what I aim to do. It is heartening to be reminded, when perusing one of Ms Keye’s books again, that successful fiction does not always have to rely on a host of improbables, but can revolve around ordinary, decent and faithful people with whom I have something in common. It’s nice to feel, in the success of one of Ms Keye’s characters, the potential of my own success.

Thank you to Ms Keyes, and thanks for reading.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

May 26, 2020

What I do in lockdown

cerebral palsy, Fran's School of Hard Knocks, Happiness Matters 4 Comments

What I do in lockdown

What I do in lockdown has altered my views so that all my workaday and long-held assumptions are being challenged.

I’m sure that, six months ago, if I’d said I would prioritise hoovering on Mondays, and washing sheets, taking out the recycling, remembering to place gardening bins on the kerb just to give me something to do of a weekday morning, I would have guffawed loudly. That, I would have opined, would have been as likely as my daughter settling down to do jigsaws, which hitherto she has scorned.

Yet, in the last few weeks, both Seline and I have completed about seven or eight jigsaws each, with no complaint and a great deal of enthusiasm.

Instead of complaining about domesticity, I now thank my lucky stars when I can visit the supermarket, am grateful there is food on the shelves, and shop conservatively, mindful of the twin injunctions to shop as infrequently as possible, but without hoarding. I’m grateful too, for daily acts of heroism from those who keep turning up for work in hospitals, schools and shops, fearful, perhaps, of becoming unwell, but also grateful to have gainful – and such useful! – employment.

One of the good things to have come out of this current situation is the recognition, finally, that the “small” occupations many people have, are vital for all of us. The recognition that ordinary people, going about their usual jobs, are really important to the continuing function of their communities; that to be relied upon, as a teacher, a medical technician or a parent must be, is a useful, indeed one of the best, ways to contribute meaningfully.

Whatever else I may learn, the restraints currently imposed on us have taught me, finally, what it truly means to perform routine tasks willingly and with a peaceful heart. So many of us have to take risks that I am not, nor ever have been, called upon to take. And I am grateful to them.

Thanks for reading.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

May 18, 2020

Doing everything they can

Fran Macilvey, Uncategorized 0 Comments

Doing everything they can

The standard accepted narrative in public is that the governments of the world are doing everything they can in the face of unprecedented threat, to tackle the Covid / economic emergency. And for those ahead of the curve – China, South Korea, New Zealand, Iceland – it does seem as if their quick and decisive action early on, their willingness to heed the signs and act on them fast, has helped these countries to get back to something like a new normal relatively soon.

But what about governments that fail to take heed? There are a few obvious examples: Brazil, Belarus, The USA Federal Government… Our Westminster Government failed to act early when it saw the crisis unfolding in January this year and spreading with startling rapidity. If I can see this happening in December as I check in every morning for my news update on my phone, it is fatuous of any government to claim that they “didn’t realise”. In fact, the evidence is increasingly that not only did they realise, but they pretended not to, downgraded the threat and tried to believe, as all scared children will, that if they put their heads under the covers, the monster in the room would not see them and go away.

But surely, with all the resources at its call, the government really should have seen this crisis coming and could have taken decisive action earlier. And arguably, their failure to do so has cost their population dearly and amounts to a failure of duty. Is this why Westminster talks about “a war” and “our courageous NHS workers fighting on the front line against an invisible enemy”? To obscure their own culpability in a situation in which they were repeatedly warned about the dangers and did too little until it was, arguably, much too late?

It is an argument no-one wants to have; and yet, the fact that the Westminster administration is offering families of health workers who have died a capital sum might suggest that someone somewhere has warned about the possibility of litigation. Let’s face it: in any civil legal action for damages – compensation – which only needs to be proved on the balance of probabilities – not only are the obvious heads of claim actionable, but also any outcome that is reasonably foreseeable as a result of the main failure.

So, if a person loses their job, breaks up with their spouse, loses their home, gets sick or dies, are these actions reasonably foreseeable as a result of the government’s failure to take reasonable steps to prevent the spread of an epidemic that they could see coming? In the UK, we were exceptionally fortunate in having had at least two months’ warning of the coming crisis. That we failed to make the most of that period of grace is, arguably, not only a shame, a pity and an awful waste, but, given the foreseeable fallout, actionable as well.

And I dread to think what the USA, noticeably more litigious in personal injury claims, will make of the hotch-potch of claims, counter-claims, advice and misinformation that is currently circulating there.

Thanks for reading.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

April 30, 2020

A different world

cerebral palsy, Fran's School of Hard Knocks, Happiness Matters 4 Comments

A Different World

Lockdown has brought with it the realisation that, for all our privileged existence, there are aspects of the way we live that we must change, if we are to continue having any quality of life. Though they present major challenges, the current restrictions also offer un-looked for opportunities to consider that a different world is possible.

I don’t find that the lockdown restrictions so far imposed have yet changed my daily routines or expectations radically; except perhaps to bring with them the beneficial awareness that yes, I can go for walks, and so I should make the most of that. Because I am only allowed to venture out once a day – though again, that is not such a change from my usual limitations – I find myself rejoicing when I do: official restrictions have made me very grateful and appreciative of the freedoms I enjoy.

Perhaps we will all have to re-frame or curb our notions of what we have grown used to, but the end result is that we are usually more appreciative of what we have.

The season, and the weather, are especially lovely at the moment, the routes are calm and quiet, and I can hear loud birdsong in the bushes that, un-tended, have been left to flourish. They are that shade of almost painfully bright, light green that makes me breathless.

Robins chirping loudly, blackbirds flitting and warbling, song thrushes trilling, do remind me what an invasion our usual motor vehicle noise is. The fresh green grass and the bright and blue skies unmarked by vapour trails remind me, too, that we must find ways to share the world so as not to destroy it.

We can do this, and we must. So I’m grateful for what I have and look forward to a quieter, more equitable way of living when lockdown restrictions are eased.

Thanks for reading.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

April 14, 2020

Happy Easter

Books I Have Reviewed, Happiness Matters 2 Comments

Happy Easter

It’s been a long time since I posted a blog. Despite enjoying acres of unusually unstructured time, currently I’m finding it hard to (a) find the level of privacy I usually enjoy and which allows me to work without the constant feeling that I’m excluding the rest of my family. Is this a common experience? I’m also finding it hard to (b) focus on writing about anything that is the usual subject matter for this blog, which frankly pales into stark insignificance in the face of our current health, social and economic dilemmas.

Unless I am writing in a strictly fictional context in which our previous “normal” life expectations can continue unchanged – as good a defence of fiction as I have yet come across – every word I write will be coloured by our current over-riding preoccupations.

Apart from having to live with a continual, low-grade anxiety about our future global prospects, I realise that my usual topics of conversation – editing, indie publishing, proof reading, how I read books, techniques that I have deployed to help me finish a book I’m writing – are likely to be met with the response, “Who cares? Don’t you know there is a pandemic on?” or “It hardly matters at the moment, does it? I’d count myself lucky, if I were you!” And I do, most sincerely.

So I read the news, while trying not to take it too much to heart, I fret about the future prospects of such unguarded continents as Africa, and I wonder where we will be in a year’s time. And I recommend reading cheerful, forgiving books that entertain while also being enlightening and heart-warming. Bill Bryson is my current re-read favourite, a joy which I’m delighted to say, my husband seems to have finally cottoned on to. Which makes a nice change from his usual preoccupation with books about the Great War, the Irish Wars of Independence or Edmund Burke’s Political Philosophy.

Happy Easter season. Stay well, and thanks for reading.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

March 17, 2020

Self isolation or normal life

'Trapped: My Life with Cerebral Palsy', cerebral palsy, Fran's School of Hard Knocks 6 Comments

Self isolation or normal life

When I was young I would quite often fetch a chair, a book, a drink, a snack and some music on my trusty tape recorder. My Mum would glance wryly in my direction and say, “You’re having a party, aren’t you?” And I would agree, pleased with myself, and pleased also that I didn’t have to excuse my seeming passivity. It was never part of my plan to examine why? Why was I having a party for one?

This pandemic will have far-reaching outcomes for many of us. There is much talk of economic collapse, travel and leisure restrictions, and self isolation. We are alarmed at the prospect of managing without normal human intercourse for two, three weeks, even months.

Which got me thinking. How many of us spend a lot of time alone anyway? For whom is self isolation alarming? Those of us who go to parties, meet lots of people, travel as part of their normal expectations and eat out most lunchtimes may have to start thinking about that. Until yesterday, the prospect of spending three weeks with family at home was bracing, and had not made me unhappy. It was simply par for the course, and, actually, when I thought about it, perhaps I have been used to spending acres of time alone anyway, at home. I’m used to it, and I’m certain I’m not the only one.

It seems alarming to so many of us that we will have to curtail our expectations, but a lot of my disabled friends live day and daily with curtailment, and with expectations that make the prospect of enforced home stays almost a pleasure: no more having to pretend, or make such an effort, or be part of a bigger something that simply refuses to see, and that characterises honesty as self pity.

Perhaps an unintended outcome from this is that we learn to have more empathy for those with so little: the homeless, the poor, the vulnerable, our brave minorities who only wish to belong. I count myself as exceptionally lucky that I have support, love, kindness, options and a sense of humour. And that I am good at living with little, and have been so chronically accustomed to having low social expectations. Ski-ing holidays in the Vosges? Forget it. Parties and clubs? Pubs? Not often…

Thanks for listening. Stay safe.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr

March 13, 2020

To be happy

Happiness Matters 4 Comments

To be happy

It seems to be increasingly difficult to be happy or peaceful when, lately, lots of things seem to be happening to us, and “out of the blue”: at the end of a bruising and politically divisive three years, on 31st January, 2020, the UK finally left the EU. After the flags had finally been re-arranged following the end of the final – final – extension period, full-page adverts placed by the UK government appeared in newspapers to remind the few of us who might have forgotten, that, “The UK has now left the European Union”. Good to know that, in the face of gloomy post-Brexit forecasts, revenues were being well deployed.

At the same time, at the end of last year, new headlines were appearing indicating the origins of coronavirus in Wuhan and speculating wildly about its causes, spread, and likely mortality rates. I watched the news and tracking reports with fascinated alarm, as one would watch the approach of a tornado following a clear path and bound, at some point, to pass nearby. By now we are beginning to realise that we don’t need a direct hit, for life to change utterly.

If there is any good news to be had out of recent events, it could be that, in the face of a growing climate emergency, the natural world has the chance to recover some ground. We also have the opportunity to reassess what really matters to us, and to work co-operatively to find sensible, practical and compassionate outcomes that include us all. Increasingly I see that working together need not be difficult, but can be immensely rewarding, both for the unexpected joy we uncover and because in working together we are more open to sharing and being inspired by new and interesting possibilities.

By finding solutions that include everyone – it is interesting, for example, that the emergence of Covid-19 in the USA has finally forced the political concession that everyone who needs it can get tested, and everyone in need can get treated – finally, we may see the beginnings of a recognition that effective solutions are, and have to be, inclusive. “Value” is not just about the stock markets or the size of our wallets.

I’m going to be taking a break for a while. It’s a time for reassessment and reflection. More than ever, we need to listen to each other, avoid jumping to conclusions and try to stay healthy, cheerful and optimistic.

Thanks for listening.

Please share:

FacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblrFacebooktwitterpinterestlinkedintumblr
1 2 3 4 5 >»
This site uses cookies More info