Recently, I have been reflecting on what writing means to me, and whether my time is well spent. I mean, seriously, what is it all about? Why have I put myself through five of the most difficult, emotionally draining and – let’s face it – financially unrewarding years of my life? If I was an outsider, considering pros and cons, on the surface, I would conclude that Fran Macilvey is peculiarly driven: driven to work all-nighters while her family sleeps; driven to continue with the next project, the next hope, despite setbacks, illness and puzzlement from those more sober and grounded citizens of my acquaintance who really would prefer that I would apply my energies to a proper, reasonable, sensible and obvious job. Why, for goodness’ sake, must I always be different?
Because I am, is all. I make that sound nonchalant, easy to say. But if my life has taught me anything, it is the total futility of trying to keep up with other ‘ordinary’ people who have ‘ordinary’ jobs. I’ve tried that – really, I have – and it has only led to heartbreak and loss of a different kind.
In the old days, the pain was about not belonging, never fitting in, and never really understanding what was going on; I had that sinking feeling which made it plain that I never would understand, no matter how hard I might try. Nowadays, though there have been a few disappointments and false starts, I am more certain that I understand the basics and will continue to make progress. On my present path, every difficulty lends itself to a purpose, for a reason. It is easier to notice the ways in which unexpected outcomes serve a longer-term goal.
And above all, I write so that I may share my experiences with others. I can write, and so I should. I can explain, and so I do, in the hope that those who may read my pieces know that I understand something of their loneliness, their anger, even their desolation. It is not unusual to have these feelings, it is not peculiar or suspicious. They are just part of life.
Gradually, writing had revealed that our ‘bad’ experiences often complement the ‘good’, making our lives a tapestry which, when we look back at it, hopefully fills us with gratitude and optimism. That is how I see myself making the best of life’s knots, at any rate.
Thanks for reading.
Please share:
D
May 5, 2015 @ 5:09 pm
I loved this piece, I read it several times. It is so full of bravery and kindness and your own special brand of humanity. Lovely
Fran Macilvey
May 5, 2015 @ 5:42 pm
Thanks so much, Diane. Your support means so much – so much! – to me. XXX 😀
Elouise
May 7, 2015 @ 2:05 am
Hi, Fran.
I especially love the last paragraph. Which is to say I love all of it, and especially the last paragraph! I’m frustrated by having to come in the ‘back door’ to find your blog (via Google), instead of having you immediately showing up in my Reader or in my list of Blogs I Follow. Perhaps there’s a secret I don’t yet know. If so, and if someone reading this knows what it is, I’d love to know, too!
Looking just under this comment box, I see I can sign up for new posts by email. Is that what I need to do? I’ve checked them off just in case!
Love and hugs!
Elouise
Fran Macilvey
May 7, 2015 @ 10:48 am
Thanks so much, Elouise. Your thoughtful comments are wonderful.
I’m still learning about how my website works. (I’m so used to just clicking ‘follow’ and all the links do the rest.) I’ll take a look around the dashboard and see what else I can spot, and let you know.
XXX
Elouise
May 7, 2015 @ 12:19 pm
Thanks, Fran. A couple of things: I’m not receiving your posts in Blogs I Follow, either (even though I checked that as my preference yesterday via email notifications). And I see my gravatar isn’t registering (as Clare’s is below).
I am, however, receiving your posts now in my email–so I’m feeling more connected than I was 24 hours ago. Progress!!!!
Elouise
Clare Flourish
May 7, 2015 @ 12:10 pm
I have followed by clicking the box. I had not received this on “Bogs I follow”, as it is a wordpress.org site.
Possibly I do not belong: but I am beautiful, and therefore it is the world’s loss!
Elouise
May 7, 2015 @ 12:22 pm
Hi, Clare. Yes, you are beautiful! Thanks for your response to my plea. Did you do anything special to make your gravatar show up? Mine seems to have vanished.
Elouise
Fran Macilvey
May 7, 2015 @ 2:56 pm
Hello, darling, Thanks for your comment. 🙂 Seems you can follow by putting a tick in the box below the post…. xxx
Elouise
May 7, 2015 @ 4:27 pm
Hmm. Yesterday I figured out how to get your posts via email (clicked the box under this reply box!). However, I don’t see a follow button under the post itself. I do see a share button. Maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be? I’m thinking there’s no gravatar for me because I’m counted as an email-only follower. Oh. I also don’t see any like button–though maybe you set it up that way?
Sorry for all the questions!!! Please take them as a compliment–I love your writing, and following your life journey!
Elouise 🙂
Fran Macilvey
May 7, 2015 @ 5:09 pm
Thanks so much Elouise
What you have done works well, I deduce. There is indeed no ‘like’ button, and I’m not sure why. I may ask my technical friend about that.
You checked the right box to receive posts, thank you. (There is indeed no ‘follow’ button under the post itself.) The website is set up slightly differently from my previous WordPress account, I surmise. I will work with it, and let you know if I make any new discoveries.
Thank you for your comments, and for your love. I reciprocate most sincerely. ♥ (((xxx))) 😀
Elouise
May 7, 2015 @ 8:50 pm
Thanks, Fran! I’m happy. You’re not lost and I’m feeling more found by the minute! Looking forward to more posts….and sending lots more love and happiness your way.
Elouise