Not making New Year Resolutions
Phew! What a relief. No New Year Resolutions for me.

I think that, on balance, I have enough to get on with, without feeling guilty that, yet again, I have made – several – promises and didn’t keep them. At the start of any year, who needs that kind of pressure? In fact, making any promise to do or not to do, so often feels like a taunt, an invitation to stray. So now I save my headspace for things I want to get done: phone that friend, go shopping, go for a walk, do some work. Just do it.
Perhaps because the New Year is so close to my birthday, when I was younger, the New Year was an almost sacrosanct time for starting over, beginning again, doing better… But by whose measure should that be judged? My own view of what I was doing, was – and too often still is – inclined to disappointment and perfectionism. Which is to say, that I too often failed to notice the many small-step achievements that inch me from A to B, and castigated myself too readily for not reaching the stars when I said I would.
Perhaps now is not quite the right time to arrive at the stars. Or perhaps, I would be better to realise that I get to the stars one small step at a time; doing a small thing towards a big aim is so much better than doing nothing at all.
So progress in small steps is the order of the day, and thankfulness that I usually manage to do – most of – what I plan to do. Which sounds far more sustainable than a bunch of promises to myself that I know, almost even before I make them, I will feel guilty about.
There is no substitute for the small determination that takes us an inch forward at a time.
Thanks for reading, and Happy New Year 2019. May all our dreams come true.
Please share:
January 3, 2019 @ 6:00 pm
Spot on – I’ve never been one for New Year Resolutions – If I decide I need to do or change something then I have always been rather impatient to get on with it. I agree completely about the avoidance of extra pressure – have too much guilt already and I’m not even Catholic 🙂
Happy New Year to you and yours x
January 3, 2019 @ 8:19 pm
Thank you so much, Diane! I think that we spend too much time thinking about what we should be doing, instead of simply doing it. So that is my new plan for 2019. All the best! 🙂 xx
January 3, 2019 @ 7:48 pm
I’m with you, Fran! The personal rewards (internal and sometimes external) for doing just one small or lowly task, or even part of a task can be mindboggling! It feels so good to get even one little thing accomplished in a day. I also find that my past lists have been driven by guilt or by what I think others expect from me. Enough already! I want to please myself! As often as possible, and without wondering whether anyone noticed.
Thanks for this no-nonsense post. Sadly, we don’t seem to have arrived yet at the not-driven-by-outsider’s opinions finish line! 🙂
Hugs and cheers for 2019!
Elouise
January 3, 2019 @ 8:17 pm
The other thing about doing jobs I think I ‘should’ is that I’m chasing these, and chasing never really works for me, somehow. I find everything a great deal easier when I make up my mind what I want, ask for it, and then take the opportunities that come to me. It’s fun watching how this process can work out. ‘Ask and ye shall receive…’ 🙂 xxx
January 5, 2019 @ 10:41 pm
Ah, Fran, stars are so last year…who needs them? Just keep writing and you’ll be one 🙂
January 6, 2019 @ 3:07 pm
Ah Val, you are so wise and funny. Stars indeed are probably several years old by the time we see them. 🙂 I shall keep working, and doing what I do, and hoping for the best outcome possible, always. Thanks so much for the encouragement. xxx
January 7, 2019 @ 2:02 pm
One easy resolution to keep – short walks and more visits to cafes to test cakes and coffee. It works for me.
January 7, 2019 @ 3:08 pm
Hi Tom,
You point out the obvious – of course! Thank you! – that we can just resolve to be content. I can just see you enjoying coffee and cake. 😉 I wish I could join you, but alas! C & C are not for me. Happy New Year, and I hope you enjoy your perambulations. I hope you stay upright in this breeze. 🙂 xx