Four times more effort
The London Book Fair this year was the most enjoyable I’ve experienced. I met some truly delightful people with whom I hope to keep in touch, and came away with lots of new and refreshing ideas.
Chatting as one does at these events with like-minded and generous souls, we take away different thoughts, and ideas that stay with us. Like this one from a new friend, that, apparently, for a person with impairments – like mine, I presume – it takes five times more effort to do anything than for an average bod. In my case, perhaps four times as much effort, or three; but the point was made, and made me think.
If it takes me four times more effort to undertake a physical task, which takes me three times as long, how does that impact on my life? It must mean that I will, probably, get less done in an average day than you would, and that my efforts need to be carefully considered. To put it bluntly, doing jobs I dislike takes me so much effort, that I should not do them. I should spend my time doing what I enjoy.
Well, yes, of course, we all should. Doing what we enjoy is the key to our success. But I suppose my point is that, given the energy and time and thought expended, I should really never do jobs I dislike. And if I have to do them, I must, for the sake of my sanity, find ways to do them that I can enjoy, or at least, appreciate: I do notice that I am slower and more laboured than others, a realisation which is hard, sometimes, to accept.
On the one hand bolstered by having this understood – Wowee! At last someone recognises the sweat that goes into this! – I am rather depressed by having it confirmed: How much effort have I wasted doing jobs I hate? I mean, we all have to do things we don’t like, but in the normal course of events, “other people” – how I hate that phrase – can do them much faster and with less physical and emotional investment than me, so in fairness, they should do them, while I put my efforts into being happy.
Which raises more questions that need answers, like, “Why haven’t I?” and “When will I?” and “What is stopping me?” I seem to have spent an inordinate amount of my effort and time doing things for other people. Of course, again, we all do. But how much is too much?
Thanks for listening.
Please share:
March 19, 2019 @ 12:50 pm
5x sounds low to me. I’m sure as a teen I had a test done (I think it was gait analysis) that worked out as part of it how much energy I use compared to the average person without CP. Maybe something to consider? But yes, when used in the right way, it’s useful info.
March 19, 2019 @ 1:12 pm
Hi Emma
Thanks so much for popping in to comment – it’s lovely to hear from you. I had thought, if you add effort and time, you get a factor of seven; which is my lucky number. It is sobering to recon up how much time I have devoted to circumstances that didn’t require my help. Or where someone else could have done a better job. Still at least – better late then never – I now have some kind of ready reckoner to help me decide whether I want to do a thing, or whether I’m doing it simply because I always have done, or feel I ought to.
What I ought to do must actually depend, more than I realise, on whether I would enjoy it.
((xxx))
March 19, 2019 @ 1:25 pm
This makes sense to me and yes, when you think about it this is all the more reason to limit the things that you put the effort into to things that make you happy – of course.
I wish I could convince myself of this though and I am one of your ‘other people’. The hours I have spent doing things I don’t like doing just so that I feel justified doing what I do like are uncountable – and to be perfectly blunt most of it is down to guilt and a sense of duty. Ah we are complicated beings are we not? Anyway – you just be happy Fran 🙂
March 19, 2019 @ 3:46 pm
Dear Diane
If course I’ve always known it was so, but somehow, to have another person comment has made it all more real, and brought me up short to ask all kinds of uncomfortable questions. Do I hate myself? Why on God’s earth have I forced myself to endure trauma and discomfort, knowing – as I have known – how much it would cost?
When we are unhappy, we are not the only losers, are we? Guilt plays its part, and so does the simple fact that without our contribution, a job will not get done. But, then, does that matter as much as our own choices? Somehow, I doubt it, though the world of practical necessity is very good at persuading us otherwise. You be happy to, angel! 😀