Happiness Matters

May 26, 2017

Publishing step by step

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Publishing step by step

My main aim, with publishing step by step, is to acquire some basic knowledge about how self-publishing works, with all the details included and ticked off from an incredibly long list, one at a time. Do one thing, and two more beg to be taken care of…

Not so very long ago, undertaking a task of this web-like intricacy would have given me nightmares; and I take it as a sign of real progress that these days, I am happy to plod on, meeting and dealing with first this stepping stone, then that one, until completion of this set of tasks morphs from a possibility into a probability.

To start a task and finish it properly becomes a valuable lesson, and I am pleased to see real progress in that.

I have read some excellent books on the subject of self-publication, one of which has now become my go-to bible. But no book can give us all the answers, so I have to select the most motivating and meaningful bits from a range of different sources and then make decisions which have unknowable consequences: still a novice, but catching on fast.

Happiness Matters is now available on Kindle, and as soon as I can agree the proof, will be available in paperback on Amazon and on many other outlets through Ingram Spark: I have opted for wider paperback and e-book distribution through Ingram Spark’s channels.

I am very grateful for the encouragement and help that I have received thus far, particularly from my darling husband, from my wonderful editor Claire Wingfield, and from Jane Dixon-Smith who has done such an amazing job with cover design and formatting. Having such amazing and friendly help to get this far is incredibly precious.

Thanks for reading.

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May 22, 2017

Reading Joanna Trollope

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Reading Joanna Trollope’s The Soldier’s Wife I come across this passage early on, which had me leaping out of bed

‘….Dan had said that deployment on active service made you long for extremes, either the supreme domesticity of home when you were away from it or the violence of action and danger when you were back. You couldn’t halt the pendulum, he said, you couldn’t stop it crashing from side to side, often out of control. Even if it sometimes hit her – or the children – as it swung….’

Something about this passage resonates with me.

I habitually spend time waiting around – still waiting – for others to come back, for life to tell me what to do, for the push that I need to venture forth. And I have always blamed that particular passivity – shyness, failure, fear – on disability.

But perhaps it has more to do with an abiding sense that my life, the patterns of it and the way the weave and weft wraps itself around me, has been defined by what other people need and decide: the parent who works abroad; the partner who cannot make up their mind whether to leave or stay; the children who have to fit in with patterns set up by others – the need for continuity which boils down to a choice of boarding school, where patterns are set in stone…. but which haemorrhages a domesticity that my husband, for example, can take more for granted.

I suspect that one of hubby’s templates says to him, ‘Parents are here and will always be here, so you may venture – go!’ but my templates tend to suggest to me that I should wait and see what  happens, what others decide, because their choices will define what I can do.

But none of us can live our lives like that, not really, not always. We have to jump, and hope that we have a good landing. We have to dive in and see what happens, experiment and hope for the best. Otherwise, what happens to the quality of our lives?


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May 19, 2017

Being happy as defiance

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Being happy as defiance

I’m well aware that, writing a book about how to be happy, I’m likely to come in for a certain amount of stick from certain quarters. Hey, even my internal critic has a go at me sometimes, What the hell do you know, sitting in your ivory tower while the world is going to Hell in a hand-basket. Grow up!

Apart from the context, that I have been – was – depressed for many years and found a way to claw out of that; Apart from the realisation that writers write about things so that they can understand them, and in that sense, happiness and the achievement of it deserves as much attention as any other subject we can write about, there is a more basic point running through all this.

Happiness Matters, because so often, people are anxious to deprive us of it. And in their attempts, they so often succeed. They succeed, until, one day, we decide that Actually, No, I AM going to be happy, because, I may be stuck in the social, emotional and psychological equivalent of a Gordian knot, but I defy anyone to take away my right to be kind, caring and loving, and to enjoy my life.

It is only when the chips are down and we are facing our nemesis – okay, now I know that this person doesn’t care how much damage s/he inflicts, now I see that; now I know s/he doesn’t care if I live or die, that s/he is quite calm facing the prospect of my demise – or more seriously, causing the death of a close family member I can’t get to, perhaps – it is only now that I truly understand why my brother insisted that we be happy, as we watched his struggle with cancer. To transcend suffering means to defy it to turn us ugly. Even as we cry and worry and wish things could be different, we have the power to enjoy.

In difficult circumstances, gentleness and being joyful and loving are our true gifts, the only things we may have to offer in a horrible situation; and the only way we will ever claw back enough energy to smile again, to keep going forward, and to enjoy life, appreciating the gifts offered by blameless, generous, kind-hearted souls who know nothing of our torment.

We would no more allow someone to savage a painting with a knife, than we would wish to weep and rant and go ever so slightly crazy in the midst of a maddening situation. Happiness is a prize worth protecting, and fighting for. Because happiness really does matter.

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May 18, 2017

Reading Books

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Reading Books

So in the midst of a busy Tuesday – riding, laundry, shopping – last week I went to the library and quickly collected four books, all different, and so far, all good. If you want to see what they are, visit Goodreads where I have updated my ‘currently reading’ shelf.

The interesting thing is, so far, that apart from being grateful that they are all good enough to keep me reading to the end – some are better than merely good – these books have all, in their varying ways, reminded me of something valuable. Something to do with the importance of language to communicate experiences that I won’t be living directly. More than I’m usually aware, I’m learning from even fairly fanciful plots – I will never live in a lighthouse on a tidal island or run my own village bakery – about motivation, what love means, and why it matters that we should each make our individual and very particular contributions to the world.

I hope to review each of these books. Meantime, it is a wonderful relief to reacquaint myself with the thought that reading books – good books – is good for me and goes way beyond mere escapism or time filling. I read quickly and sometimes deliberately to forget stuff going on, or to allow my head some down time. For example, it is better for me to read books in the evenings, tucked up in bed, than to spend hours staring at the computer, checking messages in the blinding white back-light that keeps me awake for far too long afterwards.

Reading encourages the discipline of getting to bed at a reasonable time, and staying there; a discipline worth encouraging after years spent endlessly thinking, typing, plotting and planning. If I can glean some value from what other authors are plotting, then so much the better.

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May 16, 2017

Happiness Matters

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Happiness Matters

The publication of my latest book Happiness Matters on kindle yesterday marks one small milestone on the ten-year journey to put my dreams for a bit of daily peace and joy into practice.

 

It has taken ten years, from the time I first sat at my computer and said, ‘So now, I am going to write about how to be happy’.

Writing about happiness matters seemed a bit presumptuous, back then, until I realised that writing is how I express myself best, and how I make sense of things. I desperately wanted to be happy, and besides, making that decision I felt happier almost immediately. (If I’d known it would take ten years from inspiration to publication, I might have thought better of it. I’m glad that we can’t see that far into the future.)

So often I have known, with my head, what it means to be peaceful, yet each day presents me with fresh challenges, fresh teasing reminders that the journey to peace is ongoing. Given what we learn from the news, in social media and from our friends, family and our colleagues, it can be  an effort to maintain serenity in the face of ongoing frustrations. In my bleaker moments, I walk a path strewn with obstacles, with questions that seem to float out of reach, chasing answers that shift all the time.

But despite the temptation to be gloomy, it is better for me – and for everyone around me – if I can at least try to be kind, conciliatory, peaceful and forgiving. Life works out better and I get along with a lighter step, instead of a heavy trudge that might collapse sometime soon….

There have been bleak moments and there have been sunny days. The publication of Happiness Matters is a whole sunny afternoon!

Happiness Matters on kindle is to be followed shortly by the paperback and wider distribution through a number of platforms. If anyone would like a review copy meantime, please just ask.

Thanks for reading!
 

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May 7, 2017

Every indie author is different

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Every indie author is different.

We all do things in our own ways, and indie publishing is one area in life where it is impossible to generalise. The technology and the rules, the specifics are always changing, so publication represents a best guess snatch at the options, which will have changed again by this time tomorrow.

But how exciting to realise that the indie landscape is constantly evolving: so many other landscapes are fixed and uniform, it is delightful to consider that indie publishing creates and fosters a huge number of choices, an infinite number of options.

It has been commonplace to assume that indie publishing is the new kid on the block, a parvenu who has a lot to learn. But indies have a lot to teach, also, about the power of publishing, the mobility of modern communication trends, and the right of all to have access to publishing media. Many, many books which have long been classics on our shelves started life as indie published books, modern indie publishing merely refreshes a trend that has been around for hundreds of years. In some ways, indies are keeping alive a noble tradition, and helping the industry to evolve and keep pace with modern communications.

A president of the Michigan Savings Bank said to Henry Ford’s lawyer, “The horse is here to stay, but the automobile is only a novelty—a fad.” He ignored the advice. Publication is an adventure that we learn from, and that teaches us there are as many publication variables as there are flowers in the park, and the remit is constantly expanding.

I am enjoying preparing my second book Happiness Matters for publication, which should be happening later on this month. The details of how that will work, once broken down into bite-size chunks, are manageable…and meantime, I’m looking forward to having another publication to my credit, another string to my bow to make music with.

Thank you so much for reading!

 

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